I'm so sorry my last post was so... bleak. Honestly yesterday was a hard ass day, and today was just a day for crying and getting it all out. I do feel better now. I understand now how people that are brave are just like me... they have no choice. They just grit their teeth, close their eyes, and jump, because there's no going back. I will do this. It will hurt. Maybe the most pain I've ever had in my life, but I will do this. And in the meantime, when scary thoughts crowd my head (which is about every 5 mins), I will be good to myself. I will eat chocolate, and have chinese food. I will watch stupid movies and laugh myself sick. I will buy myself something pretty... maybe a new iPod cover. I will nap whenever I want. And if I need to crawl into my sister's lap and cry like I did today until I feel better, I will. Because she's here and she understands, and she knows I'm stronger than I think I am.
I will be good to myself. This has all come about because I was busy taking care of everyone but me. I don't regret it for a second but I have a favor to ask everyone that reads this: please, if you're Irish, or fair skin, if you have moles, if you've sunburned alot in the past, please please at the slightest change of a mole no matter how minor, go to a dermatologist. Even if you're broke like I was. Find a way. Write a bad check if you have to. Just DO IT please. And don't lay out in the sun. Tanning beds? Why, yes, cancer would be lovely. The only safe tan is a spray tan. Or else love yourself as a very fair skinned person.
Because of one stupid mole, I may very well be fighting for my life. At the very least I'm getting big chunks of my body removed. All because of one stupid little mole.
Don't be like me. Please. Don't lay in the sun, don't ignore changes in moles, don't put off seeing a dermatologist.
I love all of you....Love yourself.
Love, love, love. (Thank you Eva for your strength).
I will be good to myself. This has all come about because I was busy taking care of everyone but me. I don't regret it for a second but I have a favor to ask everyone that reads this: please, if you're Irish, or fair skin, if you have moles, if you've sunburned alot in the past, please please at the slightest change of a mole no matter how minor, go to a dermatologist. Even if you're broke like I was. Find a way. Write a bad check if you have to. Just DO IT please. And don't lay out in the sun. Tanning beds? Why, yes, cancer would be lovely. The only safe tan is a spray tan. Or else love yourself as a very fair skinned person.
Because of one stupid mole, I may very well be fighting for my life. At the very least I'm getting big chunks of my body removed. All because of one stupid little mole.
Don't be like me. Please. Don't lay in the sun, don't ignore changes in moles, don't put off seeing a dermatologist.
I love all of you....Love yourself.
Love, love, love. (Thank you Eva for your strength).
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